This message, like pretty much all my other messages is really for myself. I write these things down to remind me to take my own advice. During a particularly helpful conversation with a very good friend, she told me straight up to pull myself back and remember that I can’t do anyone else’s work for them. It is never my job to do their work, it is always theirs. Right there the striving/helping bubble I was in burst and I took a full breath for the first time in days and days. Sometimes a good slap upside the head works!
Therefore I want to write down the things that help me;
1) As Byron Katie (The Work) states; There is Your Business, My Business and God’s Business. The only Business I have business being in is mine.
2) Never tell someone to practice something I never would or I have never successfully practiced.
3) Rest, rest, rest. And when you think you’ve rested enough, rest some more.
4) My value is not based on how much I do or how much I help.
5) Admit when things are shitty. Moving forward is much easier after that.
6) Even when things are shitty, have some fun.
7) It’s o.k. to ask for help
8) Take a break. You’re no good to anyone if you burn out.
9) Don’t make it about you – if the one in need of care sees you taking on their pain, their recovery stalls.
10) This too shall pass.