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The Patriarchal Model of Womanhood; It’s Called Female Emotional Neglect

17/2/2021

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I can confidently say, most of my struggle and pain in relationships is a direct result of Emotional Neglect. Being under-nourished and under-developed emotionally keeps us without the resources to be fully ourselves, to contribute to and enjoy the world as much as possible.

I've experienced this and I see my friends and 'sisters' continue to experience this. It breaks my heart.
 
The Internalized Patriarchal Model

Childhood emotional neglect is very common and recovery is possible. Even if you were not neglected as a child, if you're a woman, you have encountered the patriarchal model of womanhood. The prime components of this model are female self-sacrifice and female neglect. The model is so ingrained in our culture and in our female and male DNA that we are barely aware of it. We are not only controlled by patriarchal restrictions, we have internalized them to the degree that we are now controlling, editing and shutting down ourselves.
 
Too Emotional

If you're a woman, you've likely been told at some point, you're too loud, talk too much and you're too emotional. There's a reason for this. It keeps our power in check. To effectively shut a woman and her power down, diminish her and relegate her to the background and constantly tell her she is 'too emotional.'

Female emotions are superpowers. Emotional outbursts happen because they are necessary.
 
Our Children Are Watching
When we recognize where we are shutting our power down, going along with the patriarchal model and take steps to recover from emotional neglect, recovery is possible. 

When we recognize that our children, our sons and our daughters, are watching us, recovery is necessary.
FEMALE EMOTIONAL NEGLECT RECOVERY PROGRAM
*Understand your history of Female Emotional Neglect

*Notice where you are playing small, shutting down, being restricted

*Take effective recovery steps
​
*Begin to experience your life in a new way
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​Jennifer Washington 

Certified Martha Beck Life Coach 


What Now Life Coaching 
​

www.whatnowlifecoaching.com 
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Intentional Wellness

9/2/2021

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With no one really knowing definitively how to avoid this virus and it's new mutations, I fully embrace all of the recommended protocols—I always wear a mask when I go out. I am not meeting with anyone indoors. I wash my hands frequently and I keep physical distance.

The rest of my efforts are going to boosting my immunity and keeping myself healthy. I do know that none of my intentional wellness habits guarantees my health and safety! But I feel strong doing what I can, where I am, with what I have.

Food🥬
I eat fresh fruits and vegetables every day. I'm vegan so this is my 'main' diet.
I do indulge in comforting carbs, because, winter, and comfort! I do limit white sugar and flour, although I am more relaxed about it on the weekends.
I drink lots and lots of water. 

Rest😴
I go to bed around the same time every night and get up around the same time every morning. Routine really, really calms anxiety for me. I get an average of 7-9 hours of sleep. I have not always been a good sleeper—as most mothers can relate! I have practiced good sleep hygiene for a number of years and now it's working for me.
I also have an afternoon rest and read time. This is what feeds my creativity tank. Usually about the time I think I might close my eyes and 'meditate' for a minute, I'll get an inspiration of some kind!

Exercise💪🏻
I have a short, daily yoga practice to keep me limber/flexible. I do 1 to 3 long walks/week and short ones almost all the rest of the days. Fresh air each day helps my nighttime sleep. Even when it's bitterly cold, I bundle up thoroughly (no bad weather, just bad clothes!) and at least walk around the block.


Creativity/Hobbies🧶
I do a fair bit of binge watching t.v. and movies in the evenings, but I've taken up crocheting while I watch. 
I do something creative everyday. As I mentioned, I crochet, paint, colour, play guitar/piano and/or play with digital photos and graphics (like the one below!)

​I spend more time cooking than I used to. On weekends, 
I look up recipes and try making things I  haven't before. I made pretzels! My friend Laureen is a food blogger (Art & the Kitchen). The pretzel recipe is HERE
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Fun🥳
It's a stretch some days! It's fun for me to text my friends and family (I love emojis!) and I've brought in our out-door bean bag toss game. My husband and I play a game every day after work! So far he's won more than I, but every now and again I get a win. We also play a game or two of cards on the weekend. I play several different kinds of solitaire on my computer each night before bed.


Gratitude🙏
I do gratitude writing every morning. It sets the tone for the day and I remind myself how privileged I am!

I did not go directly from a burned out, Coca-cola drinking, cheese and meat eating, over weight, cigarette smoking depressive to a person with wellness habits overnight. These habits were a process!
Therapies. Coaches and Therapists. I experimented and took what worked for me.
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I do, of course, have low-energy days, even days when I feel sad and discouraged. I know this is 'normal' during the best of times and even to be expected during this very unsettling time. I try not to plan/think too far into the future because the uncertainty makes me anxious. By focusing on wellness each day, I keep myself present and maintain a feeling of some 'control.'

What about you? How are you spending your pandemic days? How is your health and well-being?
Stories About My Journey
Care Giver Burnout
Five Steps to Support Your Weight-Loss Resolution
How to Break Up With Your Bad Habit
Depression, Your Personal Message, The Back Story


❤️VALENTINE'S DAY BONUS❤️
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Self-Love Practice

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​Jennifer Washington 
Certified Martha Beck Life Coach 


What Now Life Coaching 
​

www.whatnowlifecoaching.com 

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    On my journey back to wholeness I have explored many modalities and can honestly say the What Now Life Coaching session was one of the most illuminating (yet non-invasive) interactions I've had.

    Jennifer used an interesting variety of tools to further guide me towards my "North Star" (soul's calling) and I walked away feeling grounded, comforted, validated and inspired.
    ​
    -Angela, Shaman.

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