Can you be happy for a friend/loved one, or even a stranger (!), when things are not so great for you? And, can you be sensitive when things are great for you and not so great for your friend?
I am in relationships with people who know what my struggle is, my current woes and they are so gracious and tender with me. I watch as they tamp down their joy, happiness or good fortune. I ASSURE you; I am truly happy for them and their happiness and success. I can feel sad or have struggle and still have space/capability to celebrate with another.
Belief in Scarcity
I also am in relationships with people who are jealous of what goodness/happiness/success others have and actively lament the fact. This confuses me. I can’t understand how the happiness/success of another takes anything away or threatens another. It must boil down to the belief in scarcity–there is only so much resource to go around. So, if you have lots, it must mean there is less for me. I have more to say about jealousy HERE. I’m pretty sure happiness and success are first, defined by the individual – everyone’s idea is different and second, potential for happiness and success are unlimited.
Also, I know many who say they are ‘relieved’ when tragedy befalls another, because it has therefore, ‘missed’ them. Is misfortune a dark energy that seeks prey?
What Does it Mean?
I’m not sure what being able to be happy for others when you're not doing well is a sign of; maturity? (age!), self-esteem? (probably a little). Expansion? (you can see more than one side of things). Good mirroring? (you have good emotional sensitivity.) All of the above? And other things.
Isn’t it Great?
We all live in parallel universes. We are all having individual experiences alongside our fellow humans all at the same time. Isn’t it great that we can have so many experiences? Isn’t it amazing that we are able to be in our own experience, while at the same time observing, witnessing and celebrating the experience of another?
I am in relationships with people who know what my struggle is, my current woes and they are so gracious and tender with me. I watch as they tamp down their joy, happiness or good fortune. I ASSURE you; I am truly happy for them and their happiness and success. I can feel sad or have struggle and still have space/capability to celebrate with another.
Belief in Scarcity
I also am in relationships with people who are jealous of what goodness/happiness/success others have and actively lament the fact. This confuses me. I can’t understand how the happiness/success of another takes anything away or threatens another. It must boil down to the belief in scarcity–there is only so much resource to go around. So, if you have lots, it must mean there is less for me. I have more to say about jealousy HERE. I’m pretty sure happiness and success are first, defined by the individual – everyone’s idea is different and second, potential for happiness and success are unlimited.
Also, I know many who say they are ‘relieved’ when tragedy befalls another, because it has therefore, ‘missed’ them. Is misfortune a dark energy that seeks prey?
What Does it Mean?
I’m not sure what being able to be happy for others when you're not doing well is a sign of; maturity? (age!), self-esteem? (probably a little). Expansion? (you can see more than one side of things). Good mirroring? (you have good emotional sensitivity.) All of the above? And other things.
Isn’t it Great?
We all live in parallel universes. We are all having individual experiences alongside our fellow humans all at the same time. Isn’t it great that we can have so many experiences? Isn’t it amazing that we are able to be in our own experience, while at the same time observing, witnessing and celebrating the experience of another?
Jennifer Washington
Certified Martha Beck Life Coach
What Now Life Coaching
www.whatnowlifecoaching.com
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