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Shame on You? Signs, Symptoms & Solutions
Shame is based on a perception of failure, of not measuring up, either to your own, usually unrealistic, standard or the ‘rules’ of your society or community. Brene Brown says, “Instead of feeling that we have done something bad, with shame, we feel we are bad.”
I perceived I was ‘bad,’ very early on. Any discipline I received reinforced my belief, proving it was true. The way I viewed religion also went through this filter. ('I am bad/broken and in need of saving.).
This foundational shame state showed up particularly strong in my unrealistic expectations of marriage and motherhood. When the inevitable problems of life and relationships cropped up in my home, I inappropriately reacted, believing that problems meant I was doing ‘it’ wrong and any discomfort or pain experienced by others was my fault. I rushed in to smooth over, solve, eliminate any discomfort or flaws. All the while, making certain we outwardly appeared to be doing fine. I could think of no greater pain than being judged as a bad wife/mother.
Signs and Symptoms of Shame
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I perceived I was ‘bad,’ very early on. Any discipline I received reinforced my belief, proving it was true. The way I viewed religion also went through this filter. ('I am bad/broken and in need of saving.).
This foundational shame state showed up particularly strong in my unrealistic expectations of marriage and motherhood. When the inevitable problems of life and relationships cropped up in my home, I inappropriately reacted, believing that problems meant I was doing ‘it’ wrong and any discomfort or pain experienced by others was my fault. I rushed in to smooth over, solve, eliminate any discomfort or flaws. All the while, making certain we outwardly appeared to be doing fine. I could think of no greater pain than being judged as a bad wife/mother.
Signs and Symptoms of Shame
Continue Reading....
Hi and Welcome!
I'm Jennifer Washington. I am a certified Martha Beck Life Coach.
What does that mean? Once I completed MBI (Martha Beck Inc) Life Coach Training way back in 2010, the brilliant, Martha Beck personally tested and declared me worthy to Life Coach . I work with people who are multi-talented achievers that may have forgotten how to find the answers within themselves. I help people determine their true hearts desires and assist in achieving them. (see further: What Does A Life Coach Do?)
I'm Jennifer Washington. I am a certified Martha Beck Life Coach.
What does that mean? Once I completed MBI (Martha Beck Inc) Life Coach Training way back in 2010, the brilliant, Martha Beck personally tested and declared me worthy to Life Coach . I work with people who are multi-talented achievers that may have forgotten how to find the answers within themselves. I help people determine their true hearts desires and assist in achieving them. (see further: What Does A Life Coach Do?)
Why I Became A Life Coach
Video: Whispering Winds Audio
Editing: Left Brain Promotions
Editing: Left Brain Promotions
Why Is My Business Called "What Now? Life Coaching?"
A few years ago I woke up inside myself. Some would describe it as a mid-life crisis or a meltdown. I knew I needed help, but I didn’t know how to start. The closest I could come to activating a search engine investigation was “What Now?” I came to a cruel realization that I had done everything I was ‘supposed’ to do and I was miserable.
Fast forward to the present, after Life Coaching entered my world. I now describe that melt down as my awakening. I’ve discovered my inner guidance, how it works and I can teach you!
If you are at a point in your journey where the most resounding question you have is “What Now?” please call. 403-813-6406 or email: coachjenniferwashington@gmail.com
Fast forward to the present, after Life Coaching entered my world. I now describe that melt down as my awakening. I’ve discovered my inner guidance, how it works and I can teach you!
If you are at a point in your journey where the most resounding question you have is “What Now?” please call. 403-813-6406 or email: coachjenniferwashington@gmail.com
Check out my Blog:
Mushroom to Sunflower Blog.
Check out my upcoming classes and services
Services/Contact Me
What Clients Are Saying About What Now Life Coaching
Jennifer Washington is awesome and inspiring. Her guidance has been life changing. Jenn has walked beside me in my life journey and is always rooting for me. What a wonderful feeling having her in my corner. Jennifer continues to support my search for worthiness and peace. She constantly inspires me to continue to work toward emotional healing – not doing it for me, but giving me the tools to move forward with a courageous desire to overcome my self-imposed limitations. Jennifer’s ability to guide and remind me of my worth and helping me see myself in a realistic light is amazing and a complete blessing to me. She has lead me to recognize and see past my imperfection to understand “I am good enough”. Thank you Jennifer for your generous and encouraging guidance and support while taking this journey with me. -Marsha; Corporate Consultant
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"I think what you do when you are listening to me during our sessions is listening for meaning behind the stories...the content is kind of the 'noise.' I see now I have choices in my life (therefore freedom), to make the best ones I can with what I have, to take responsibility for outcomes, 'forgiving myself. Letting others make their own choices. Having a choice about how to feel about outcomes. Not taking responsibility for other people's choices. You do good work, Sistah!
-Jaquelyn, Medical Intuitive. |
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I never thought I was the type of person that would ever need or want a life coach figuring I could always sort out everything by myself - that was what I had always done.
I had a certain amount of pride in that. However, my life was starting to unravel, a little bit at a time. I was starting to wonder who I really was and how the rest of my life was going to play out. Even more importantly I could feel I wasn’t living a very authentic life and was definitely not living to my potential. Nor was I living the creative life that I yearned for. I had several projects on the go, some failing, some barely started, but nothing felt right. I knew I wasn’t moving in the right direction. And really, on a whim I called Jen. What could it hurt I thought? The truth is it didn’t hurt, and it was easy compared to how I was trying to sort though challenges on my own. The most important thing that Jen has done is to give me the tools I need to manage problems and even my relationships. She has helped me to see past my old habitual ways of trying to ‘fix’ problems and people. Just a little shift in my thinking and perceptions has produced amazing results. Jen is intuitive, nonjudgemental and positive. I look forward to our sessions. Every week I see real life results. Today I look forward to the future with energy and a happy expectation. Ruth, Author |
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