What does nurturing mean? Is it your job to nurture yourself or someone else’s? What makes you feel nurtured? Why is winter lasting so long?
These are the questions I’ve been living. Because of my physical fatigue, I have had to look at ways to nurture myself and to look at how I am not taking care of myself. I have been ‘programmed’ as I think most women are, to take care of everyone else first. We can’t help it, it is wired into our being. The trouble is we have added a whole lot of other stressful responsibilities to our nurturing activities which leaves us all depleted at the end of the day/week/month.
At first I was tempted to use my physical tiredness as an excuse to opt out of life. I could say no to everything and everyone and I’m not going to lie… I liked it! Soon it occurred to me that I have choices. Do I really want this to be my story? How is this serving me or anyone else? No! I decided to be well. To do what it takes to get well and to maintain a positive outlook to the best of my ability.
The absolute biggest help has been talking! I was not aware of how I had quit voicing my thoughts and feelings and what a detriment that is to my well being. Apparently women are wired to talk too… who knew?! Kidding! It is now a proven scientific fact that healthy hormone levels increase in women when they talk. But… and there is always one isn’t there? Talking for the sake of talking does not do it. We need to feel heard. The first genuine relief I experienced was when I hired a counselor. Having a compassionate listener miraculously eased my pain and suffering. Now, talking meaningfully with a good friend is a priority in my week. It actually gives me energy.
I am careful what I say yes to. I take care of what is necessary and the rest of the time I devote to things that make me feel happy, things I genuinely want to do. I am learning to look closely at the things I think I ‘should’ do. Those are the killers! I am learning to make friends with my body; to respond to it lovingly and attentively. This is also something that women need to re-learn, but that is a whole other blog post!
I am discovering that taking care of myself is taking care of others. When I am whole and fulfilled , I have much more to offer to others as well, I have much more willingness to be of service. And, maybe winter is lasting longer so that we can all have a longer rest period! Who knows what will ‘spring’ up at the end of this.
These are the questions I’ve been living. Because of my physical fatigue, I have had to look at ways to nurture myself and to look at how I am not taking care of myself. I have been ‘programmed’ as I think most women are, to take care of everyone else first. We can’t help it, it is wired into our being. The trouble is we have added a whole lot of other stressful responsibilities to our nurturing activities which leaves us all depleted at the end of the day/week/month.
At first I was tempted to use my physical tiredness as an excuse to opt out of life. I could say no to everything and everyone and I’m not going to lie… I liked it! Soon it occurred to me that I have choices. Do I really want this to be my story? How is this serving me or anyone else? No! I decided to be well. To do what it takes to get well and to maintain a positive outlook to the best of my ability.
The absolute biggest help has been talking! I was not aware of how I had quit voicing my thoughts and feelings and what a detriment that is to my well being. Apparently women are wired to talk too… who knew?! Kidding! It is now a proven scientific fact that healthy hormone levels increase in women when they talk. But… and there is always one isn’t there? Talking for the sake of talking does not do it. We need to feel heard. The first genuine relief I experienced was when I hired a counselor. Having a compassionate listener miraculously eased my pain and suffering. Now, talking meaningfully with a good friend is a priority in my week. It actually gives me energy.
I am careful what I say yes to. I take care of what is necessary and the rest of the time I devote to things that make me feel happy, things I genuinely want to do. I am learning to look closely at the things I think I ‘should’ do. Those are the killers! I am learning to make friends with my body; to respond to it lovingly and attentively. This is also something that women need to re-learn, but that is a whole other blog post!
I am discovering that taking care of myself is taking care of others. When I am whole and fulfilled , I have much more to offer to others as well, I have much more willingness to be of service. And, maybe winter is lasting longer so that we can all have a longer rest period! Who knows what will ‘spring’ up at the end of this.
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