The Resistance
I feel I have lived much of my life with my brakes on. Maybe you can relate? A combination of my childhood experiences, my naturally skeptical essential self and the bizarreness of human behaviour in general, have developed within me, no small amount of resistance behaviours. I take everything with a grain of salt. If I’m told something is ‘good for me,’ I demand wildly dramatic results before I’ll get on board and agree. Consequently, I am quite slow to learn things. My aha moments take a while and they require clues from numerous sources, over a period of time.
Resistance Is An Opposing Force to Anything That Feels Remotely Like it Can Alter Our Current State
I’m discovering, this opposing force is me! And I am opposing reality. I, like you, maybe, was taught to overcome, push through and conquer resistance with discipline. That works well when you’re body-building or training for a marathon. In personal growth, resistance is a message. When I feel resistance now, I see it as a clue that there is information trying to get my attention.
At it’s very core, resistance, to anything, is our ego’s way of protecting us. We have carefully constructed all kinds of barriers to being hurt emotionally, physically and psychically. Anything that comes along that feels remotely like it can alter our current state – even if that state is terrible, it is a familiar state, and we love familiar way more than uncertainty – is met with resistance. But, what if the thing we are blocking, even though it will upset our current state, is exactly what we need in order to grow and expand?
My Resistance is a Gang of Guerilla War-farers
I have held off my growth and expansion heroically. For years. I am a master at protecting myself from things that may feel uncomfortable. But, guess what? I’m tired. Resistance is hard. My resistance is relentless. My resistance is like a gang of guerilla war-farers, cleverly and consistently finding ways to sabotage me and my life, like the masses overthrowing dictators. When I sit down with these freedom fighters and thank them for their protection, I can see what is hiding behind them. Reality. Meaning what’s actually happening, not what I perceive through all my defense filters is happening. Reality always has the information I need to become a better me. A more helpful, useful, contributing, happier me.
Let Resistance Go and Die
What does letting go of resistance look like exactly? It means hearing the negative feedback. It means doing the action I’m scared to do. It means being honest about what’s not working in my life. It means dying to who I think I am and becoming who I really am.
I have not mastered resisting reality, by any means. I am still getting my bearings–attempting to drive with my foot off the brake – not quite on the gas yet. My resistance always at the ready to battle reality, temporarily.
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